1039. People are saying "I mean" more lately, and we explain what it ... means! Plus, we look at why people leave out pronouns at the beginning of sentences such as "Ordering pizza!"
1039. People are saying "I mean" more lately, and we explain what it ... means! Plus, we look at why people leave out pronouns at the beginning of sentences such as "Ordering pizza!"
The "I mean" segment was written by Valerie Fridland, a professor of linguistics at the University of Nevada in Reno and the author of "Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the Good in Bad English." You can find her at valeriefridland.com.
The "pronoun deletion" segment was written by Karen Lunde, a former Quick and Dirty Tips editor who has crafted hundreds of articles on the art of writing well. She was an online education pioneer, founding one of the first online writing workshops. These days, she provides writing tips and writing coach services at HelpMeWriteBetter.com.
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Grammar Girl here. I’m Mignon Fogarty, your friendly guide to the English language. We talk about writing, history, rules, and other cool stuff. Today, we'll look at the new way people are using the phrase "I mean," and then we'll look at how dropping words from sentences can actually make us feel more connected.
This next segment is by Valerie Fridland.
by Valerie Fridland
Maybe it is not surprising that inviting people to reconsider the merits of things they don't like about the way other people talk would generate a little controversy. After all, we are nothing if not wedded to our firm beliefs about linguistic correctness.
Yet, as a linguist who studies the history and evolution of speech habits, even I was surprised by the number of people who get riled up by what appears to be a recent uptick in the use of the phrase “I mean” to start off sentences. I mean, one would think it was linguistic Armageddon, given the irritation it provokes.
“I mean” is part of a larger class of words and phrases in English that linguists call discourse markers. These are words or short phrases that don’t contribute directly to the meaning of a sentence. For example, they don't carry concrete meanings the same way nouns and verbs do, like "cookie" and "munch." Instead, they contribute what linguists call pragmatic or attitudinal information — in short, vibes. In other words, you can remove discourse markers without making big changes to the literal meaning of the sentence.
So, I can say, “I got a new job,” or I can say, “Oh, I got a new job,” and both sentences convey the same literal meaning that the speaker is now employed somewhere. But the discourse marker “oh” adds nuance — that this is new information and requires a shift in topic or awareness (for example, it's something the speaker just remembered).
Discourse markers do many things in conversations, but they're all important for communicating, especially in spoken conversation. They often help with conversational flow and link speaking turns (like "now," "so," "then"), show a person's stance or attitude (like "well," "I mean," "oh"), or suggest shared knowledge or agreement (like "you know").
For example, saying “well” when you are starting to speak generally suggests that what comes next won't be the response someone expects from you. So when your boss asks whether your weekly sales report is ready, you might begin with, “Well, I had to wait for John in accounting to get me the numbers,” before admitting the report isn't quite ready for prime time. In short, the word "well" conveys you're going to say something you know will be slightly disagreeable in the context of this conversation, but you follow it with some kind of explanation.
Now, the discourse marker "I mean" does a similar thing in that people tend to use it to correct or further explain a previous statement (for example, "I mean, it’s not that I don’t like eggplant, it's just not my favorite"). In this way, using "I mean" can function as what linguists call a repair or a politeness strategy — something that's meant to keep everyone happy. This is traditionally how people use the phrase "I mean."
But in the recent uptick in use that gets some people’s goat, people seem to be using “I mean” not to clarify, but instead to signal that they're intensifying or justifying something, marking a point as obvious, or making clear a stance or attitude. For example, let's say you express dismay that your friend is driving you both 15 miles out of the way to go to a different coffee shop than the one along your route. She might reply, “I mean, they simply have the best coffee.”
This use is also where “I mean” sometimes can take on more of a derisive tone, as in “I mean, like, they know anything about raising kids.” This type of “I mean” also invites some buy-in or alignment from listeners because it's meant to elicit solidarity around a particular belief or position.
Some people call this attitude-giving “I mean” the “sassy I mean,” but it can be used in either a sassy-snarky or sassy-playful way; for example, if you debate whether to have another piece of cake, and your friend says, “I mean, it is your birthday!” This playfulness is most obvious when “I mean” is left dangling, like when someone asks if you want a chocolate brownie, and you respond simply, “I mean ….” to indicate, duh, obviously, yes.
Crucially, understanding this use of "I mean" usually requires everyone in the conversation to have some shared knowledge, like that the people whose parenting you're questioning insulted your parenting or that you always love dessert.
So are we right about “I mean” now seemingly being everywhere? Although a Google Ngram search doesn’t differentiate between using “I mean” as a main subject and verb versus using it as a discourse marker, we do see a big increase in the use of the phrase “I mean” starting around the early 2000s relative to the past 200 years. And this certainly suggests that something new is afoot.
This uptick showing up even in writing is likely the result of two things: First, a shift in the sense of “I mean” to include this newer attitudinal one and, second, the new-to-this-century growth of social media where catchy expressions spread like wildfire if they capture some cultural zeitgeist. “I mean,” especially in its snarkier form, was tailor-made for the type of short, zingy tweets and comments that build on a post or news bite and invite other people to hop onto the sass train.
In particular, with our new hybrid style of online communication — more like conversation but in writing — we actually need ways to signal how we want other people to interpret what we say. “I mean” before a comment helps make sure readers understand how it's intended — giving off the vibe of sarcasm, snark, or a shared stance. This also explains the standalone posts that read simply, “I mean, I mean, I MEAN! [with the last one in all caps]”
So, whether you are a fan or not, chances are this discourse marker has already come to be part of your daily life and, while it may feel overused, it is definitely useful. I mean, why not just go ahead and get on the bandwagon?Â
That segment was written by Valerie Fridland, a professor of linguistics at the University of Nevada in Reno and the author of "Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the Good in Bad English." You can find her at valeriefridland.com.
References
Fox Tree, J. E., & Schrock, J. C. (2002). Basic meanings of you know and I mean. Journal of Pragmatics, 34(6), 727–747.
Irwin, P. (2022). Sassy I mean and the conversational scoreboard. Paper presented to the American Dialect Society. Washington, D.C.
Kiesling, S. F. (2020). Investment in a model of stancetaking: I mean and just sayin’. Language Sciences, 82, 101333
by Karen Lunde
Have you ever called out to your hungry family "Ordered pizza!" instead of "I just ordered pizza"? If so, you’re tapping into an age-old linguistic shortcut known as conversational deletion.
But is "Ordered pizza!"Â a complete sentence? Where's the subject? Who ordered the pizza? Your high school English teachers might be clutching their red pens right now, because we all learned that every complete sentence needs a subject and a verb.
If you're old enough, you might remember the famous dairy slogan: "Got milk?" There's no subject in that, either, but "Do you have milk?" just doesn't have the same pizzazz, does it?
Actually, this kind of word-dropping happens all the time in many situations: hurried conversations with family, text messages to friends, quick emails, and social media posts, just to name a few. Linguists also call it "ellipsis," and it's an interesting feature of casual English where we deliberately leave out certain words, especially when we're sure our meaning will still be clear.
"Ordered pizza" and "Got milk?" aren't technically complete sentences in formal English. But in real-world communication — both spoken and written — they're perfectly fine. Our brains fill in the missing words either through context or because of our relationship with the writer or speaker.
So, let's talk about some parts of speech that often disappear with conversational deletion. Just like in the "Ordered pizza" example, dropping pronouns is a common form. In casual speech, we tend to drop pronouns at the beginning of sentences. So, instead of saying "I'm going to the store," someone might say "Going to the store."
We also omit articles like "a," "an," and "the." Before leaving to run an errand, you might jot a quick note to your family that says, "Went to store," instead of "I went to the store."Â
And here's an interesting sidebar: Omitting articles sometimes happens in British English where you wouldn't hear it in American English. For example, you'll hear it in phrases like "She went to university" instead of "She went to the university" and "His wife is in hospital" instead of "His wife is in the hospital." But although phrases like this can sound odd to American ears, they're standard usage in British English when you're talking about certain institutions in the abstract sense. But it's worth noting that this isn't a strict rule, and it can also vary depending on context and regional dialect.
Here's another example of conversational deletion. Forms of the verb "to be" like "am," "is," and "are" get dropped frequently. Like: "You going to the party?" instead of "Are you going to the party?"
We sometimes even eliminate most of a sentence, stripping it down to its barest essence. If you're texting your long-distance friend who's flying in for a visit, you might type "Can't wait!" instead of "I can't wait to see you!" Even though you've left out the subject — "I" — the prepositional phrase "to see" — and the object — "you" — you can safely assume your friend knows exactly what you mean.
So why do we drop words like this? Well, there are some fascinating reasons for the phenomenon, and they show just how smart our brains are when it comes to communication.
First of all, word dropping can be about creating closeness. Think about it: when do you feel comfortable enough to write "Can't make it — feeling sick" instead of "I can't make it because I'm feeling sick"? Probably with close friends or family, right?
When you write  in this casual, stripped down way, you're actually sending a subtle social signal that suggests you have a bond with the person on the receiving end. Think of it as creating intimacy through language. Â
Think of conversational deletion as the linguistic version of your favorite sweatpants. You wouldn't wear them to an important event or meeting, but you're perfectly comfortable wearing them around your family, close friends, or maybe even strangers in the grocery store when you're having one of those days.Â
But we also use conversational deletion as a sort of shorthand to save time, particularly when we're dashing off a quick or casual note. After all, it takes fewer thumb-strokes when you're texting to type "Running late" instead of "I'm running late to our lunch date." And what's better than efficiency when you're already delayed?
We've talked about conversational deletion as a sort of shorthand in things like texts, social media posts, or other types of brief notes, so you might think of it as a more modern phenomenon. After all, there were no character limits in Shakespeare's time.
But actually, conversational deletion is almost as old as language itself.Â
During the Anglo-Saxon period, around 1000 CE, "Bidde eow" was a common opening in letters. It translated to "Bid you" instead of "I bid you," dropping the subject, but our modern interpretation would be more like "I ask you."
And yep, even Shakespeare — who was a linguistic rebel anyway — used conversational deletion for dramatic effect. For example, he used
And finally, telegrams are a 19th century example of text-based communication where conversational deletion was the norm. But in this case, brevity was practical for economic reasons — telegram companies charged by the word.Â
So next time you text "Running late" or scribble "Need milk" on a sticky note, remember: you're not being lazy. Actually, you're upholding an ancient language tradition while being linguistically efficient and socially sophisticated.
That segment was written by Karen Lunde, a former Quick and Dirty Tips editor who has crafted hundreds of articles on the art of writing well. She was an online education pioneer, founding one of the first online writing workshops. These days, she provides writing tips and writing coach services at HelpMeWriteBetter.com.
And finally today, I have a familect story:
Hello Grammar Girl. This is Vincent from California. My familect is "cat-tracted."
It dates back to when we adopted a cat from the shelter. She is a beautiful Siamese mix named Karina. The cat is adorable, but ornery, and isn't usually interested in cuddling with her humans. But that doesn't stop us from dropping everything we're doing just to stare at her.
This human behavior gets in the way of chores and homework, so a portmanteau soon developed to describe what was going on. We said we were cat-tracted when we needed to verbalize that we were distracted by Karina's cuteness when she was bathing in a sunbeam.
The cat-tracted formula proved fruitful in our household, and now you'll hear about my son being book-tracted if he's nose-deep in a good book, when he should be getting ready for school.
And just last night, it came full circle when I accused the cat of being grass-tracted, when I caught her sneaking cat grass from the window sill. Thank you for the podcast. Take care.
This is so great, Vincent! Your family has created what linguists call a new "productive ending" — something you can use to make lots of new words. It's just like the "-"gate" suffix from Watergate and how when we hear it, we know it's referring to some kind of scandal, like "cookie-gate," "confetti-gate," and so on. Good job. Thanks for sharing.
If you want to share your familect, a word of phrase your family uses based on some shared experience that nobody else would understand, you can do that in a voice chat on WhatsApp, or you can still call the voicemail line at 83-321-4-GIRL, and all of those are in the show notes, which you can find in your podcast listening app. I want to hear your stories!
Grammar Girl is a Quick and Dirty Tips podcast. Thanks to Davina Tomlin and Nat Hoopes in marketing; Brannan Goetschius, director of podcasts; Dan Feierabend in audio; Morgan Christianson in advertising; and Holly Hutchings in digital operations, who says she actually wants to see a bear when she's hiking.Â
Holly! We used to see them all the time when we were hiking close to neighborhoods in Tahoe, so head up there, but be careful!
I'm Mignon Fogarty, better known as Grammar Girl and author of the tip-a-day book "The Grammar Daily," which — hint, hint —makes a great gift. That's all. Thanks for listening.